


darling, only i know your bruises

by twentyone



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: M/M, Zayn is sad, but its ok bc they love each other, fucking corny, liam is sad, perrie a hoe anyway
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-02
Updated: 2014-04-02
Packaged: 2018-01-17 21:42:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,128
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1403443
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/twentyone/pseuds/twentyone
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>zayn and liam, moments before zayn and perrie's wedding</p>
            </blockquote>





	darling, only i know your bruises

It’s stifling in the men’s dressing room. Liam only just changed into his suit half an hour ago, but the sweat stains under his arms are dark and prominent. His black jacket will cover them up, of course, but it will also make him sweat even more. He scratches at his stubble absentmindedly, foot tapping an erratic rhythm against the checkered, polished floor. 

Sunlight streams in through the window to Liam’s left, three o’clock heat a steady, uninterrupted warmth. He watches the minute hand creep slowly up the curve of six to seven, seven to eight. Tries to sort through the tumult of feelings churning in his gut, tries to remind himself that there’s a reason why this is all happening. It’s partly his fault, for calling it off with Sophia after his birthday party, although who could blame him for that? Their cover had always been the weaker one, and by the end neither of them were hardly making an effort to keep it all together. She had been relieved, and so had he – at least until they were told that Perrie and Zayn were to actually get married in the coming summer. 

“The fans want it to happen.”  
“Give Little Mix the boost they need to make it in the US.”  
“And they’re not a bad-looking couple either.”

Liam shook his head irritably as he recalled the stupid reasons management gave them. He could remember that day clearly in his mind’s eye, the five of them squeezed on the tiny couch in the tiny common area of the bus as it took them from one big city to the next, Paul delivering the news with a tight-lipped grimace as if it pained him just as much as his boys. Liam had been sitting between Louis and Zayn when Paul had said ‘Zayn and Perrie are going to get married.’ Louis had jumped up immediately, leaving the four others to fall into each other as he began to shout indignantly at Paul, cursing profusely until Zayn wrapped his arms around him and told him to calm the fuck down. Louis had complied, no one said no to Zayn. 

He had initially felt stunned, completely in shock that the hoax would actually be taken that far. And then, angry. A tidal wave of fury had risen and crested over him during the next few days. He hadn’t even been able to face Zayn and spent hours boxing, stopping only when he was so dizzy he could barely stand. 

After his anger was spent, Liam and Zayn took a week off in New York. Holed up in a fancy hotel, they passed endless days smoking weed, talking, and fucking as if they were the last two people on earth. And Liam realized that Zayn being married to Perrie wouldn’t separate them like he had feared it would. 

He tells himself this over and over again as he stands waiting in the hot dressing room. Zayn is his. Zayn would never leave him for Perrie. Perrie understands it too, and it isn’t her fault, isn’t any of their faults. They never asked for this to happen. But in the long run it won’t matter because after One Direction has run its course, after they’re in their thirties and ready to settle down, Zayn’s still going to be there for him. 

The wide double doors to the dressing room open, cutting off Liam’s racing thoughts. He straightens up and lets his hand drop from where it was rubbing his temple. Zayn walks into the room, pulling his tie under his collar. He looks up, sees Liam, and stops in his tracks. 

They stare at each other from a long moment. Zayn is wearing black pants and a long-sleeved white collared shirt, freshly pressed, creases perfectly aligned. The top two buttons are still open, revealing a small triangle of olive brown skin that Liam’s spent hours licking, biting. The black tie hangs limply down his front. But it’s Zayn’s eyes that enchant Liam, they always have and always will. He looks tired, unsurprisingly. Neither of them got much sleep last night. The faint purple bruises Liam knows so well have been carefully covered with foundation and powder. 

He takes a tentative step towards Zayn, and another, until they’re only a foot apart. Zayn’s long eyelashes flutter as he blinks rapidly, no no he can’t cry now, not yet. The silence between them stretches on, rising, cresting, falling.

“Big day.” The words echo hollowly in the sunny yellow room, somehow too ominous for a wedding day. 

“Yeah.” 

They continue to stare at each other. Words are hardly necessary at this point, so Liam closes the gap between them and wraps his arms around Zayn’s small frame, feeling him respond to Liam’s embrace without hesitation. He buries his nose into Zayn’s thick hair, which smells strongly of perfume and is sticky with hair gel. 

So unlike Zayn in the mornings, all soft corners and dopey smiles. Liam is the only one who knows him like that and he keeps that thought at the forefront of his mind as he lets his hands play across Zayn’s back, which is also damp with sweat. 

“Liam,” Zayn says thickly, pulling back and tilting his head up and bringing his mouth to Liam’s. They kiss quickly, urgently, anyone could walk in on them at any second and Zayn’s about to get married and it’s happened so fast, Liam wants to stop time at this exact moment and keep Zayn inside of him forever, away from the cameras and lights and just stay in the quiet with his Zayn, his Zayn. 

“It’s okay,” Liam whispers breathily as they part, leaning his forehead against Zayn’s, noses bumping. “We’re going to be okay. I’ll be there for you on the other side.” 

“I don’t want to fucking marry Perrie,” Zayn mumbles raggedly, eyes tightly shut. “I want to marry you, no one else.” He looks like a doll, precious, delicate. Skin pale despite the heat, eyes wide, full-blown. 

“I know, babe. I’m yours now, and I’ll be yours after the vows. I’ll be yours tonight and every night.” 

“I love you, Liam. So much it scares me. I’ve never felt this way about anyone before, I’m fucking scared to lose you, I-“

“Shhh,” Liam soothes him, kisses Zayn hard and fast to silence his fears. “I’m not going anywhere.” 

“I love you.”

“I love you. Zayn, you’re the only one.” 

They stand like that for some time, wrapped around each other in the large white sunny room, dust particles floating gently in the air, suspended. 

He’s already memorized all parts of Zayn, at all the times of day, so there’s nothing left to do but wait for the inevitable to come.


End file.
